I was due to have a mammogram done, my second one, expecting it to go like the first I had 1.5 years ago. Just dense tissue again, only more of it...I thought. Kind of funny, even when the mammogram tech had a doctor read the mammogram right then and came back to tell me I needed an ultra sound done before I left that day, I still never thought anything other than it was probably an insurance thing, you know, get the most from insurance.
Ok, so the ultra sound was done that day and I was on my way, simple, painless, great! A few days later I got a call saying I needed to have an ultra sound guided biopsy done.....OOOOOOkayyyyy, let's do it. The doctor that did it was great and I felt very little. Of course I am asking him..."Is it a mass or nodule, or tissue, or what is it that you are doing the biopsy on?" He really didn't answer me as I guess they never do, so he pussyfooted around a specific answer, he finished and I was on my way home.
The next step was to go to the doctor that referred me, so she could tell me the results. That was an experience in itself, let me tell you. I had only been to her one time, upon the referral of a very good friend who really likes her. So my second visit went as follows...John and I were waiting in the office for at least half an hour. Finally we hear that little tap on the door and in walked the doctor. As she was shutting the door, she looked at me and said these words..."DEBRA, YOU HAVE CANCER AND YOU NEED TO GET IT TAKEN CARE OF QUICKLY." No hi, how are you, no empathy, no feeling, nothing. Thankfully I am a very strong person, so I just looked at her. She had her face pretty much buried in her computer, looking at me once in a while, but she really didn't have anything else to say....
Ok, what now, she is not telling me anything and I am not sure what questions to ask. So I begin asking her whatever came to my mind, which was not much. "Is it a mass or a nodule or just tissue, how big is it, what stage is it in?" etc. She kept her face buried in the computer and kept scrolling up and down on the report she had. I had to ask the same questions a few times, only to hear, no it's not a mass and she didn't know how big it was. She did tell me what it was "Invasive Ductal Carcinoma, Well Differientated" but didn't tell me anything about it. Without going on and on, I left the office with no information except for a copy of the pathologist report which I could not make heads or tails of along with a referral to a surgeon.
Great, I have cancer and I have no idea of how big or how bad. I have a niece that is a Physician's Assistant who lives in Florida, so I scanned the pathology report and sent it to her. She interpreted the report for me which gave me the information about the tumor, and told me that invasive means it has spread into the breast tissue...that is all she could tell from the report.
Now what do I do? I just left an incompetent doctor who gave me the name of a surgeon...is the surgeon a friend, is she just like the doctor I had seen? What do I do, where do I turn? I reluctantly made the appointment with the surgeon and at the same time did some research about UCLA and made an appointment with a doctor there. I was going to cancel the appt. with the surgeon here, being concerned about what she may be like. John talked me into going anyway, just to see what she was like, still keeping my appt. in California and I am glad he did.
I would get teary throughout the day, just out of the blue. Is it any wonder why...I have been diagnosed with breast cancer, have no clue about it, don't personally know of a good doctor, but do know a surgeon makes all the difference in the world, not only with their diagnosis, but with their skill as well. Thankfully, the surgeon here in Vegas turned out to be fabulous. I also found out she is highly recommended.
The size of the tumor was diagnosed as 2.95 cm, the size of a golf ball is what I was told. The next diagnosis was 2.0 by the PET scan. Ok, we can do a lumpectomy and get rid of it. The PET scan even said the cancer was not in the lymph nodes yet. Great, let's move forward and get this done. Well...the MRI came back that there were spots all around the tumor, supposedly not cancerous just as the PET scan told us, but they needed to be removed. By the time the tumor and the spots were removed, that would leave very little left in the breast. The reality of it all, a mastectomy was in order.
As soon as the doctor left the office that day, the tears began to flow like a waterfall. I was not prepared for that, it's not what I bargained for and certainly not what I expected to hear or have to choose. That news affected me for about 4 days. I was prepared for the lumpectomy and radiation with possible chemo, not a mastectomy where a part of my body was going to be removed.
December 14th, the day of surgery. I knew I had a wonderful surgeon in place, so all I needed to do was go to sleep and wake up, it would be all over. After all the tumor was 2 cm and the PET scan told us it was not in the lymph nodes less than two weeks ago. To make things good while preparing for surgery, I had a wonderful anesthesiologist who walked along side of my bed as they were wheeling me down to the operating room. When I entered the operating room, the 50's song, "Goodnight Sweetheart" was playing. Then as she was putting me to sleep she said she always plays "Every Breath You Take" by Sting...so that is what was playing as I went to sleep. It can't get any better than that.
My surgery took place at 8:30 am and I was home before 1:00 pm, yes...that same day. It's amazing what they can do with outpatient surgery these days. I had surgery on Wednesday and by Friday afternoon my surgeon called with the pathology report. It came back that I had two tumors measuring 4.6 cm, she took 6 lymph nodes, two that had cancer in them and one of those, the cancer was very close to breaking through the wall of the node. She had cleared the margins, so she got all the cancer. I am so thankful for that, but cannot figure out why the PET scan or MRI didn't pick up the size of or the other tumor. I see my surgeon this week and we will take another look at the films for sure.
It is now Sunday, December 18th and things are going very well, amazingly well as a matter of fact. My doctor told me I would not be in any pain for 4-5 days and all I would need to take was Tylenol if I felt uncomfortable. Of course I did not believe her when she told me that before surgery because all I've ever heard was how excruciating the pain was after a mastectomy. I also read about the drains and how awful they are. Please know I don't doubt the stories I've read, but mine is different thus far. I've had no (physical) pain at this point and each day that passes, I never cease to be thankful and count my blessings for that. I believe I am not the norm, nor is my surgeon but I know there are others out there that have the same experience.
I am supposed to have the drain in for approximately two weeks. After I heal, at this point I am supposed to have chemo and radiation even though I had a mastectomy, but that won't begin until after I heal in a month or so. Tomorrow begins my journey with going to a store to get a mastectomy bra and a camisole that has a pocket to hold my drain. I also need to go get my hair washed, dried and curled as I cannot do it myself at this point.
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